Secretly Inherited Millions – Concealing My Windfall from My Husband

Dear Emily,

I recently inherited a substantial amount of money from my parents after they both passed away last year. As the sole beneficiary, I now have a sizeable sum that could ensure my financial security for the rest of my life, as long as I manage it wisely.

However, I am faced with a difficult dilemma. I haven’t been able to bring myself to share this information with my husband. You see, he has never been good with saving money and tends to adopt a carefree attitude when it comes to spending. Whenever we encounter financial emergencies, I end up having to dip into the limited savings I managed to set aside for both of us.

If I were to disclose my inheritance to him, I fear he might be tempted by all the possibilities it offers and start envisioning extravagant expenses. It worries me that the money, which could potentially secure our early retirement or enable us to buy a new home someday, might be squandered on impulsive purchases before we reach those milestones.

I feel a great deal of guilt about keeping this a secret from my husband, but at the same time, I can’t shake the belief that he might be better off not knowing. I hope you can understand my predicament and offer some guidance on how to approach this delicate situation.

Sincerely,
Kathy

Dear Kathy,

It’s truly fortunate that you have inherited the kind of financial security that many people can only dream of, but I understand the challenge of being married to someone who tends to spend extravagantly.

You mentioned in your letter that during emergencies, you rely on the small savings you’ve managed to set aside. It’s commendable that you’ve been wise in saving for unforeseen situations.

In managing your inheritance, you could approach it similarly by considering putting the money away, just as you’ve done with your savings. I recommend consulting with an attorney to explore the possibility of setting up a trust. This would provide a robust layer of protection for the money, ensuring it remains secure until retirement or in case of a genuine emergency.

However, I must stress that keeping such a significant secret can take a toll on a relationship. Sins of omission, no matter how well-intentioned, can still impact the trust and openness between partners. Maintaining a strong and healthy marriage can be challenging when there’s such a substantial secret involved. The way couples handle their collective relationship with money often proves to be one of the most difficult areas to navigate.

It might be beneficial for both of you to address this aspect of your relationship and work together to find a balanced approach to finances. Open communication and mutual understanding can go a long way in resolving such issues and strengthening your bond.

Wishing you the best in handling this situation and finding harmony in your marriage.

Warm regards,
Emily